Product Apprieciation Day

In honor of my country’s recent birthday, I thought it would be a patriotic thing for me to celebrate my American-ness by paying tribute to the various commerical products by which I live my shallow, materialistc life. Yay Capitalism!

and Redbull for my daily morning wake-up bump!

Mrs. Freshly’s(tm) Cupcakes for being so much better than Hostess(tm). Sorry Hostess, but your product is dry and bland compared to the moist, sweet goodness of Mrs Freshley’s awesome chocolate decadence!

Pepsi and cupcakes: the Breakfast of Champions!

Orbit Gum for giving me clean fresh breath, no matter what! BTW, I’m totally in love with their new “Mist” line. And since I’m plugging their product, I want to suggest that they produce a bubblemint-flavored hydrating Mist variety, thanks!

And since I’m on the subject of teeth products, I’m giving some wide smiles for Crest ProHealth . I don’t know why I like this stuff better than all the rest, but I do, so cheers to their Marketing Department! They know what they’re doing, with their fancy-schmancy shiny blue boxes.

And for now, last thanks goes to Herbal Essenses Shampoo for making my hair smell nice. The clean part is a bonus.

That concludes this installment of product apprieciation day.

We shall now return to our regularly-scheduled celebrity death-watch.


16 thoughts on “Product Apprieciation Day

  1. You’re really running through a lot of different issues here.
    The Pepsi and Red Bull will probably destroy your bladder.
    The Herbal Essenses will give you very, very enjoyable showers. (Honestly, if you want an orgasm while you shower, gimme a shout, I’m free.)
    And nice shiny clean teeth. Everybody needs good teeth.

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