Week of Peeves: Thursday

Pet Peeve #4: Myself, or: not making the most of myself.

Lest anyone begin to doubt, I am certainly not perfect. I can be an annoying person, and yes, I can even annoy myself!

I suffer from Daydreamer’s Disease. The technical term is rectoencephalitis, and at any given point in the day, there’s a 50/50 chance you’ll find me with my head up my ass. I’m always lost in my own little world, thinking my petty thoughts, daydreaming stories, or (most likely) on my damn blackberry chatting with friends or reading too many damn blogs. I don’t really pay much attention to what’s going on around me unless I have a reason to. Sometimes I don’t pay attention to what I’m doing, espcially mindless rote work (which I do for 11 hours a day). That’s when I make mistakes. Stupid, petty mistakes that wouldn’t happen if I were paying more attention!

“Pay attention dummy!” My smarter self tells my recto-cranially impaired(RCI) self. “Meh.” Replies my RCI self. “I know what I’m doing. Lemme alone.”

Eventually, sooner or later, my inattention rewards me:

  • CRASH! “Congratulations, asshole! You’ve just drove through a shrub and crashed into a mailbox!” “Shit!”
  • “Oh look, numbnuts, you’ve just overcooked your mold of radioactive pellets! Best salvage that while you can.”
  • “Watch out for the doorfra–” THUMP. “Ow! My toe! CockfuckshitassholeFUCK!”

Yeah. You get the idea. And yes, I DO have quite the mouth on me. Your point is?

Only one thing annoys me more than rectoencephalitis. I’m lazy. I don’t want to do shit. Not even the shit I want to do. I tell myself everyday, “When I get home, I’m gonna focus and work on suchandsuch project! I’ve got nothing to stop me now! No distractions! Yay!” Then I get home, eat, piss, soak in water, then climb into my bed with a book or my Blackberry, cat at my side, and spend the next two hours WASTING TIME!
I am my own distraction! Hello, self! Go away and stop distracting me from myself! I’ve got meaningfulness to pursue! “Pssh!” retorts Self. “Let’s have a nosh and read the news, instead. Really, I must insist.”

I’ve got to figure out a way to discipline myself, but, meh, that’s a little too much work, yanno?

Ooo! A new blog to read! *clickity click* Ah, the Obamas finally got their dog, how nifty…


5 thoughts on “Week of Peeves: Thursday

  1. You know, with a talent like yours to put your head up your own ass, you can probably join Cirque du Soleil or Cirque du Froo Froo or whatever the heck those French Canadian monkeys call themselves.

  2. I’m going to slap you around a little here. You disciplined yourself enough to get through NaNo five months ago. Why can’t you recapture that?

    Use blogs or chatting or BlackBerrying as a reward for being productive. Did you write a page? Congrats, take five minutes and read blogs. Finish a sketch? Have a chat with a friend (who ISN’T a pain in your ass). You have the ability to do this, you just need to pull your head out of your ass so I can kick it. 😉

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