Wednesday is Hump day.

Sorry, no sex here.

I’m in a weird mood today (see my Daily Con blog for an example). I
don’t know why. Probably its because I’ve been getting something like 5
hours of sleep for the past few nights, and I’ve been chugging down
Pepsi. Or maybe it has something to do with the fact that my raging PMS
of the weekend is finally over. Yup, that’s right folks! I feel back
to my normal, even-keeled self–despite the fact that I am now bleeding
out bucketfuls of uterine tissues from my womanly parts.

How do I mean, “weird”? Well, I feel kinda playful, like tugging on
someone’s pigtails and running away….or discussing the full details of
my Aunt Flo’s visit….sometimes I feel sarcastic and cynical, and then
I don’t give a rats ass about whatever it was I was criticizing. I
frequently succumb to the urge to exaggerate bodily movements and
gestures to the point of ridiculousness. Then I laugh my head off when
my coworkers look at me funny.

….

I hate Sarah Silverman. I really really do. I’ve hated her for a long
time now…her “comedy” is rude, crude, and lame. This recent shit with
Britney Spears and the VMA only reinforced my dislike for that woman.
She’s so squinty-eyed pinched-faced, with a cocky additude that pisses
me off. Brian claims that every woman and gay man has one female they
hate to the point of passion. Like the host “Perez sez” of VH1, Perez,
absolutely hates Avril Lavigne. He draws devil horns on her portrait
and scrawls “boooo!” on her face. I’d do that to Sarah Silverman if I
had her picture.

Boo! Sarah Silverman, boo! Puss, filth, putrecence! Boo! Boo! BOOOOO!

Anyway, as I was saying….what was I saying? That damn woman….Oh,
yes I’m feeling wierd, and I don’t know why. I probably need some sex,
but alas! My dam has been breeched, and the canyon doth overflow, and
the villagers run fleeing the raging torrents.

Hump day? Humph! Sometimes I hate Wednesdays as much as I hate
Mondays.

Oops! I gotte get back to “work”. If you can call my job “work”. Is
it work if you sit on your ass all day and read blogs?

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15 thoughts on “Wednesday is Hump day.

  1. I completely understand. I have these days frequently. Personally I blame the hormones. I too hate Wednesdays as well. I wish I could jack around readinng blogs all day but most of them are blocked from work now… :/

  2. Angel: oh that sucks..I hate it when bosses get smart.

    pool: Aw thats sweet of you, but…I’m deaf and that music video didnt mean anything to me.:(

  3. Sarah SIlverman – you know the first couple of times I saw her she was pretty funny, but there is a real meanness there that I don’t like.

    Hope the rest of your week goes better.

  4. OOps. Sorry. Since I still want you to appreciate hump day a little more, Here are the lyrics:

    Aww yeah
    That’s right baby.
    Girl, tonight we’re gonna make love. You know how I know, baby? ‘Cause it’s Wednesday. And Wednesday night is the night that we make love. Tuesday night’s the night that we go and visit your mother, but Wednesday night is the night that we make love. ‘Cause everything is just right conditions are perfect. There’s nothing good on TV. Conditions are perfect. You lean in close and say something sexy like, “I might go to bed I’ve got work in the morning.” I know what you’re trying to say baby. You’re trying to say, “Oh, yeah. It’s business time. It’s business time.”

    It’s business.
    It’s business time.
    That’s what you’re trying to say you’re trying to say let’s get down to business it’s business time.

    It’s business.
    It’s business time.
    Next thing you know we’re in the bathroom brushing our teeth. That’s all part of it, that’s foreplay. Then you go sort out the recycling. That’s not part of it but it’s still very important. Then we’re in the bedroom. You’re wearing that ugly old baggy t-shirt from that team building exercise you did for your old work. And it’s never looked better on you.

    Oh, team building exercise ’99.

    Oh, you don’t know what you’re doing to me.
    I remove my jeans but trip over them ’cause I still got my shoes on. But I turn it into a sexy dance.
    Next thing you know I’m down to just my socks and you know when I’m down to just my socks what time it is? it’s time for business. It’s business time.

    It’ business.
    It’s business time.
    You know when I’m down to just my socks it’s time for business that’s why they call it business socks.

    It’s business.
    It’s business time.
    Oh.
    Ooh, makin’ love.
    Makin’ love for two.
    Makin’ love for two minutes.
    When it’s with me you only need two minutes, ’cause I’m so intense. Two minutes in heaven is better than one minute in heaven. You say something like, “Is that it?” I know what you’re trying to say. You’re trying to say, “Aww yeah, that’s it.” Then you tell me you want some more. Well I’m not surprised. But I’m quite sleepy.

    It’s business.
    It’s business time.
    Business hours are over. Right, right.

  5. OOps. Sorry. Since I still want you to appreciate hump day a little more, Here are the lyrics:

    Aww yeah
    That’s right baby.
    Girl, tonight we’re gonna make love. You know how I know, baby? ‘Cause it’s Wednesday. And Wednesday night is the night that we make love. Tuesday night’s the night that we go and visit your mother, but Wednesday night is the night that we make love. ‘Cause everything is just right conditions are perfect. There’s nothing good on TV. Conditions are perfect. You lean in close and say something sexy like, “I might go to bed I’ve got work in the morning.” I know what you’re trying to say baby. You’re trying to say, “Oh, yeah. It’s business time. It’s business time.”

    It’s business.
    It’s business time.
    That’s what you’re trying to say you’re trying to say let’s get down to business it’s business time.

    It’s business.
    It’s business time.
    Next thing you know we’re in the bathroom brushing our teeth. That’s all part of it, that’s foreplay. Then you go sort out the recycling. That’s not part of it but it’s still very important. Then we’re in the bedroom. You’re wearing that ugly old baggy t-shirt from that team building exercise you did for your old work. And it’s never looked better on you.

    Oh, team building exercise ’99.

    Oh, you don’t know what you’re doing to me.
    I remove my jeans but trip over them ’cause I still got my shoes on. But I turn it into a sexy dance.
    Next thing you know I’m down to just my socks and you know when I’m down to just my socks what time it is? it’s time for business. It’s business time.

    It’ business.
    It’s business time.
    You know when I’m down to just my socks it’s time for business that’s why they call it business socks.

    It’s business.
    It’s business time.
    Oh.
    Ooh, makin’ love.
    Makin’ love for two.
    Makin’ love for two minutes.
    When it’s with me you only need two minutes, ’cause I’m so intense. Two minutes in heaven is better than one minute in heaven. You say something like, “Is that it?” I know what you’re trying to say. You’re trying to say, “Aww yeah, that’s it.” Then you tell me you want some more. Well I’m not surprised. But I’m quite sleepy.

    It’s business.
    It’s business time.
    Business hours are over. Right, right.

  6. CS: yes! Exactly. She’s mean. Its one thing to make jokes at other’s expense, but it is possible to do it without being mean. John Stewart, David Spade, Stephen Colbert, even South Park, and Triumph the Insult Comic Dog, manage to deliver insults and rudeness without that stamp of MEANness.

    Bottom line, sarah silverman strikes me as a mean person. She doesn’t have the ability to deliver insult without offense.

    Blah…

  7. I sincerely hope it’s called work when you sit on your arse all day reading blogs, because that’s what I do Monday to Friday…

    And you should not be letting your Auntie interrupt your sex life – you need to be more creative. Tsk.

    Puss

  8. Puss: but Auntie Flo is so gross. I’d rather wait…and besides, the waiting makes the acutal act of consummation that much more sweeter. 🙂

  9. haha… flo does make us weird, doesn’t it. although, i think it makes me more “bitch” than “weird”

    haha… hope it goes away so you can back to the… err… hump… ing

    😉

  10. Well, my wife is at her most amorous when Aunt Flo visits, but that string rubs, and not in a good way……

    I hope the dam has been plugged and action has recommenced.

  11. I am now bleeding
    out bucketfuls of uterine tissues from my womanly parts.

    I’ve never read such a magical sentence in all my life.

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